Break In Day - How a Drivers Ed Instructor taught me a truth of life #JustBeingHere

 

In high school many of us are blessed enough we get the chance to take Drivers Ed.  This can mean driving around town for a credit in school - and sometimes getting lunch, or other fun side trips from the normal day to day.

If you attended Lee High School in Montgomery Alabama and were also lucky enough to have Dr. Nix as your instructor... none of this was true.

Drivers ed was the most nerve racking, stressful class you would take all year.

If you cannot tell, I was lucky enough to have this instructor.  What was the problem?

Dr. Nix quite literally wrote the book on driving.

I am not kidding.  He would quote from his book, by chapter and paragraph.  It was wild and intimidating to be taught by him - and even more so in the vehicle itself.

The very first driving day in Dr. Nix's class was called 'Break In Day'.

It was called this for a good reason, which I believe is better told by story then by explanation.

Is it possible you are ALMOST EMPTY? (Blurb)

 

If your wife is anything like mine, you may find yourself being taken care of most all the time with simple things.  A simple thing my wonderful wife will do for me at times is fill my drink for dinner for me.

Sometimes she does this for long enough I have not seen the inside of the refrigerator, let alone the jug of tea I drink, for an extended period of time.

This can cause what you see above in the picture: A trickle of tea left in the bottom of the jug.

You never know how empty you are if you are never the one to pour for yourself!

While in the example of tea this is a simple problem, and easily solvable whether it be a new drink to choose, or purchasing a new jug - there are times when it is a more crucial dillema.

Finances:

You can get yourself and and even others others into debt by not knowing the true depth of funds.

Relationships:

By always receiving, your significant other can begin to lack and become beaten down by their servant attitude.

If you only 'fill up' at church, then you have no clue of your true spiritual maturity or the depths your faith can take.

Where are you with these things?

Are you a sacrificial giver?

Are you on the receiving end of a wonderful person deserving of some move of appreciation?

Are you lost in your walk because you have no idea of the depth of your spiritual parentage?

Are your finances disappearing like magic each time you finally look into what you thought was an endless bag of holding?

Today.. 

Focus on the spiritual... 

Be sure you are gauging your level spiritually by seeking out Christ on your own.

The source of Christ is never ending, Living water, yet many of us chose to go to the man made watering hole which very well may dry up tomorrow!

Pray a prayer... Ready His word... Interact with believers around you.. And NEVER forger to SHARE your faith to anyone you can!

   

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Parenting While In Transition (Blurb)

My family is in an odd place right now.  I have mentioned before that we are 'without' a home.  We are scrounging around those who care enough to take us in.  

 

Keeping a good hold on family is a Christ thing - so I decided to give myself a bit of an evaluation.

Did we do something wrong? Some things.. yes  Other things.. No

Are you sure you did not get kicked out? Of course not... we are totally awesome people and no one would ever kick us out of anything... 

Maybe you made a bad financial decision you are just not telling us about? who knows, we make them all the time, but it certainly had no bearing on this need

We moved out of the home we were renting for the past six years because they told us they wanted it on the market.  We had/have a house on the line and were/are just waiting on closing.  I have no need to go into the annoying-ness of dealing with loan companies and what such (especially because my wife is taking care of the brunt of it while I am at work), but one thing I have noticed and would like to give advice on ... is parenting while transitioning.  

These tips are based on our failures as well as successes.  Our initial projected time for being in another person's home was 10 days - it has been about 50 and we still have plenty to go because we are now at a 'Start from scratch' point.

What We Have Done Right:

'Freedom' Is good, but Never Free:

Be certain the hold onto certain rules and manners with your child/ren.  Go ahead and plan how to work within the home you are in to keep it clean and orderly.  It only takes one person not picking up after themselves to make a mess.  Work WITH your family and not against them in trying to keep the messes down.  

Plan Many Outings:

It is much easier to deal with a closed and cramped environment if you are away from it.  My wife has been queen of creating outings for the kids and the entire family - even on a tight budget. Check out this blog that she shared with a bunch of info that could help you do the same! Click HERE! 

Bring OUTSIDE toys:

This gives the kids a chance to be outside and play, as well as give those within the house a bit of calm every once and a while.  (a pool is included in this - and has been a lifesaver for kid enjoyment I would even recommend just buying one if you are in this kind of situation in the summer) 

What We Have Done Wrong:

Pack plenty of toys for the kids:

 

If your kids are like ours they may have attachments to certain toys.  We were sure to get the MOST important, but left many in the storage building, which will make for interesting house warming gifts as the kids get toys they already owned back.  We have since bought new toys so that they have had something to play with besides just sitting and watching television. 

If you had a routine before, stick with it: 

Planning for a 10 day semi-vacation we threw out our daily routines.  At least the one I am much a part of.  Bed time. In our home we would read to the kids and pray with them.  I am positive that there was no wisdom in stopping this and plan to turn this around tonight. (this is being written a week before posted - so ask me how it is going ;) ) (as far as editing this Monday, I still have not turned this around)

Set a rock solid budget: 

The plan was to move in somewhere with minimum costs so that funds could accumulate and we could have plenty of money come closing so we would not need to borrow any.  Hopefully we are not doing too bad with this, but it is quite hard to not see something you, the kids, or the wife might want and just go ahead and purchase it.  A set amount to spend per week would be a great way to minimize the amount of funds spent.

Final Thoughts:

Be Flexible:

It is quite easy to feel defeated and 'picked on' when things do not seem to be going the way you would like.  If you go ahead and set your mind to the possibility of change, especially understanding that you likely CANNOT guess what will happen, then you will have a much easier time if things just start going in crazy routes that you never expected.  

Keep a Positive Attitude:

Your kids are watching you, and everything you are doing.  If you begin to get in the dumps and upset all the time, they are going to feed off of it and be right there with you - likely just making you feel worse.  If you can keep a positive outlook and attitude through it all, they will as well - and they may even encourage you! 

While it has been annoying and unexpected dealing with what we have, I believe we have been doing these things quite well.  

Any other thoughts? Additions - something I added sound like a bad idea to you?  

 

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My Youngest Son's Heart (Blurb)

You have seen a bunch of Kyley, and as well you have read of Elijah - now for the youngest of the bunch - Asher! 

I cannot explain to you the joy, the happiness that this little guy can call up in my spirit! 

Both the older kids just playing ball (Softball and Tball) and this is not new to you if you have read my blog for the past two weeks, but what you would not know is the excitement and desire that the youngest of my three seems to have for the game. 

Check out this video where he is running the bases!

He has a great heart for song and playing instruments - check out this little worship leader!

He is Doe Doe The Magnificent's biggest fan! See here where he does a bit of juggling - and he is just like me in the store, picking up balls and trying to juggle them all the time.

Just a few weeks ago he was terrified of water - can you tell? 

Fear gives a constant battle to all of us.  We have no idea the things that the person beside us is even dealing with.  We should strive to be an encouragement at all times.  Maybe it will be just the thing needed for that person to hop into the water and gain the same kind of joy my son is showing in the photo above!

Push through fear to enter a moment of excitement and joy! 

 
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My Five Year Old Son's Heart (Blurb)

 

I bragged quite well on Kyley last week, so I would like to do a bit of a showcase on Elijah this week.

This is me and him in the sky lift at the Montgomery Zoo!

It is quite high.. and he was perfectly fine with it - such a brave and confident young boy!

Eli is 100% full throttle all the time, until he crashes out of gas, knocked out until further notice! (The reflection in between my feet is us)

While Kyley joined 'the game' late, Elijah is right on target and starting with T-ball.  He has a bit of a problem staying focused, but that is a common thing for this age group.  He is having fun and getting better and better! 

He likes any kind of action show.. Power Rangers.. Ben 10..Avengers...You name a superhero.. he probably likes them. 

Here he is watching Shark Boy and Lava Girl for the 1000th time in a row

I have been buying these tiny 'toy' figurines and Elijah is the one ending up with the many doubles.  Check it out! (also.. follow me on instagram : @comicsmilesderk for some pretty awesome and funny stuff using these figures)

Kyley is at camp, and did a great job with earning money from her idea the previous few weeks, even if Elijah is one of the ones who desperately wanted to buy a necklace.  I found his respect and honest way of dealing with his sister in this manner to be very awesome.

He came to me asking for a dollar to purchase one of the necklaces.  I gave him a dollar and he got one.  I could have seen him whining.. screaming.. or stealing them before getting money and buying them from his sister, but somehow his heart was right.  Not only that... he amazed me even more by what he did with the necklace.

One of the girls in the church really wanted her own piece of Kyley custom jewelery, but she was not able to get money from her mother, which certainly left her disappointed.  Elijah apparently was heart broken for her and gave up HIS necklace he had just bought.  

What a wonderful heart of giving!  

I would love to end the story there, with a tiny knight in shining armor who sacrificed something 'grand' for a young lady in need, but.. that is not how it ended.. and why would it.. he is only five. 

He came to me asking for another dollar. 

I must be honest and tell you I did have two or more dollars on my person, but I was not giving them to him.  I told him he bought his already - he gave it away (which i explained over, and over how great and kind it was for him to do) but he would not get another at this time.

I understood he could get one at any time as Kyley was the one making them, and I could even pay for them if I wished.  I could take care of all of it, but I just was not at this specific time.

There are times our hearts are totally in the right place, doing exactly what needs to be done - showing a perfect attitude of selflessness, but then we turn right around and begin to 'demand' our reward for what it is we did right.  

Don't get me wrong here, Eli did not act as if he had earned the right to another one - or even try to use such logic to get another.  He just wanted one and begged for it, quite simply.  

Do you accept the gifts given to you? 

Do you accept a gift given by you does not always come with material payment? 

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My Daughter's Heart (Blurb)

 

I must say, I am quite impressed by my daughter, for many reasons.

She has done very well in Softball her first year playing, honestly way better than I imagined when we started.  

This is one of her first big hits, and she only got better from there!

She has been in dance for years, and truly has a wonderful grace (hmm.. ) in her movements, as well a creative mind for choreography! 

One of her dance teachers said this about her. (pictured with Kyley above)

She came up with this dance pretty much all by herself!

She has created some wonderful works of art over the years, and recently has begun to create jewelry!

If she has free time, she is much like me, and would rather be doing something instead of being 'bored'.  

So while in the store looking for a case for her collection (of DC figurines) we came upon a set of beads inside what could very well be the perfect display case.  She looked at it and we discussed the price being worth it due to the fact all parts would be used and enjoyed.   

Not long after getting into it Kyley revealed her idea.  She decided to make bracelets and necklaces and charge 1.00 a piece for them to help support the kids going to camp.  

We have a bunch of kids who want to go to camp and their families do not quite have the funds to make such a thing happen.  We did not want to turn anyone down so we are doing what we can to raise support for them to go.

Kyley noticed this, knowing of the yard sale idea (which was Saturday May 25th @Lakewood), and took it upon herself to take what she had been given and instead of just covering herself from head to toe in custom Kyley made jewelery - she would turn that into funds to help others have fun and learn about Jesus at camp!

I can only hope she will always have such a selfless attitude. Our talents were never meant to be something we keep hidden, or adorn ourselves with.  

They are meant to bless others!  

Whether it is the purchaser, or the one who receives the funds - in this case for certain, Kyley will be a blessing to many. 

There is not much else she could do that would make me more proud then this seemingly small action does! 

She is wonderful! 

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The Small Sacrifices of Art (Blurb)

Odd ... this has come up when it did.  I find it very interesting I get this one during the time when we are effectively homeless.  

It did not take long for my wife and I to realize our daughters immense joy in creating art.  She enjoys any medium, but really enjoys painting and there was no real place for her to be as creative as she wanted, without getting into the trouble by leaving things out in our small home. 

Many of my magic things were set up in the shed so I could get to them easily, but I moved them around so instead, the more accessible area could rather hold an art studio.  

Kyley had no idea what I had done when I told her I had something for her in the shed.  She worked hard to find a flashlight, knowing it was dark and there was no lights in the shed. She ran outside and looked around seeing it set up.  She immediately began organizing and letting me know how she was going to do the work, and set up her paintings for display.  

Her joy was infectious as I was infected by it.  My action sparked action in her... and her joy gave me exactly what I was in need of - joy.  

Joy begets joy!

But sacrifice was the start of this process.  While my sacrifice was truly not so great, it did not matter - it still birthed a great joy!  

As a Husband, Father, and just a follower of Christ - I can truly make small sacrifices over and over again and know the joy will overpower what I may have 'lost'.  I hope I can always remember this truth, and be as selfless as possible - and I pray God touches your heart helping you see even better or maybe even for the first time in this way as well!  

 

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